It is said that members of the fairer sex do not sweat but rather glow. ‘Real men’ (who purchase Best Made Co. axes, one presumes), on the other hand, do not cry. Instead we shed granules of pure, solidified salt, laced with the scent and flavour of the raw emotions that spawned them.
And should you feel the burning inclination to dub us liars, head forthwith and with all haste to London’s Hoxton Street Monster Supplies, where you shall purchase a bottle of Salt Made From Tears of Anger* (with its distinct notes of smoked Welsh Oak it stands up splendidly when danced on the rim of a Margarita, for example, or added as a pinch in a meaty Fizz).
Other saline emotions include spice-tinged Laughter and lavender-imbued Sorrow (seasonal favourites) and of course those rendered as a by-product of such activities as Sneezing (which are peppery) and Chopping Onions (which are, naturally, rather oniony). Though here’s hoping some poor chap wasn’t forced to eject them all at the same time.
Info: Single bottles of Salt Made From Tears fetch £7, or you can buy the set of five for an even £30.
* And yes, we know they aren’t actually made from human tears. But where’s your sense of adventure and romance?